I am being harassed. Sadly, in my storied career I have heard this phrase more than once. You might have even said it to me, and if so, forgive me. Here’s the deal: people seem to think that when HR hears the word harassment or harassed, or some other variation, the next thing that comes into our brains is lawsuits, court, bankruptcy, and unemployment – not necessarily in that order.

Well, for good or bad, that isn’t true – and this is because we hear it ALL THE TIME.

Employee: “My boss is harassing me.”

Jaded HR Dude/Dudette: “Ok, how so?”

Employee: “They talk down to me all the time.”

Listen, I am not saying this is ok because generally it is not; it is not a desirable behavior anyone in a management position should exhibit, but it is not harassment – it is just a bad management practice.

The EEOC states that harassment is present when: “1) enduring the offensive conduct becomes a condition of continued employment, or 2) the conduct is severe or pervasive enough to create a work environment that a reasonable person would consider intimidating, hostile, or abusive.” (Emphasis mine)

Let’s hone in on those two words: reasonable person. You or I may think that being talked down to leads to a work environment that is intimidating, hostile, or abusive – but would others agree?

Again, a lot of the things that we in HR hear called harassment is simply poor management or at least bad management practices. Some examples of bad management practices might include:

• Calling out mistakes in front of your peers

• Belittling language

• Frequently losing their temper

• Always having to be right

• Favoritism

• Etc.

• Etc.

Whereas there is a standard for harassment, there isn’t anything for bad management. Not saying that bad management doesn’t exist because trust me – I have made a career dealing with it. There just isn’t a checklist you can go off of. There isn’t a questionnaire you can go through and say “well, your management score is a 3.5 based on the Perkins Management Survey (better known as the PMS). However, like so many things – you know it when you see it.

So, if you are dealing with a situation that you feel needs to be escalated, consider the behavior and what it is. If he is telling offensive jokes, using racial slurs, or making demands that are just not right – by all means, talk to your HR pro right now, and don’t be afraid to call it what it is – harassment. If the manager is simply being a moron, you should still feel comfortable talking to your HR rep- just call it what it is – bad management. In HR we are just as worried about the costs associated with inefficiency that comes from poor management as we are about the costs that come with legal battles – or at least we should be because lets face it, that is probably more costly to the company than anything.